what makes things even worse is i never correct him.  instead, i go out of my way to make sure i don’t use my dog’s name when he’s around.  i’m not sure why i do this aside from the fact that i’m oddly attracted to him.

physically he’s nothing special.  he’s rather vanilla.  very typical white father with maybe a little more muscle.  on any given day you could randomly spit off a tall building and hit someone more attractive or at least more stimulating.

where i think the attraction lies—and this is something that i, as a cis white fag think applies to many others like myself—is in his general homophobic nature.  his oldest daughter was a classmate of mine in high school and he made it very clear that while he’s tolerable of me, he does not “agree” with my lifestyle.  

so when i see him walking my way and he says hello and calls my dog “s” while smiling i can’t help but imagine him sweaty and bent over.

as boring and juvenile as it is, explicit outward expression of cis male heterosexuality still turns me on.

but i’m pretty sure he beats his wife.